Here’s the hardest lesson I’ve learned living on this beautiful island: I still cannot escape myself. Many of us who fell into the vortex that is Roatan are escaping something, running from something or toward something else. And – as I’m sure any sane person could tell you – we all realize at some point or another that in reality we can’t escape.
Some react to that realization with another move, another rock, another distant place with unknown faces hoping it will be a safe haven. But whether here or there we cannot escape from ourselves.
So here’s my big revealing announcement: I am a workaholic.
There. I said it.
I think it’s safe to say I’ve come a long way in my life from the absolute Type A personality I was with the crushing need for perfection that essentially drove me and everyone around me mad. However, it’s still there. Try as I might, I still strive for excellence. I am overly competitive, I put blinders on to accomplish the task at hand, and I push myself to the brink before I allow myself to quit and relax. And now I know, I even do that on island time.
I started working at Ocean Connections last March as a way to make money. That was it! It was just supposed to be a job, a daily activity that I enjoyed but that didn’t require much from me. Joke’s on me, kids! In the past year I’ve taken on anything and everything and while I still enjoy learning and challenging myself with something I’ve never done before, I also realized that I was working myself crazy. And I was making other people crazy, too. (That may or may not have something to do with work…it could just be me!)
Sometimes I forget where I am. I am in paradise with my favorite person and my favorite ball of fur.
So, here I am, declaring openly that I will change that.
I’ve hired a large staff, we’re moving forward with great ideas and plans for the near and distant future, and I feel confident that the business will succeed. This isn’t me giving my notice or anything, we’re still a long way from that! But I am stating on the record that I will focus more on relaxing, enjoying this beautiful island I live on, and spending time with those I love. That includes Skype and FaceTime calls to you guys back home! Sorry for getting crazy, but you all know how I am anyway 😉
Step One: Admit the problem.
Step Two: Start working from home more. I’m doing that today, which has allowed me to get a TON of actual work done without constant interruptions (barring the many phone calls and emails I’ve still received). And spending time with Lina and getting fresh air are curing my soul. Working on the porch is highly underrated. Also, I took 10 minutes for myself to actually write this. That felt good. And rebellious!
Step Three: Take more days off! I haven’t quite reached this step yet, but I’m working on it…
Step Four: Write more. It puts things back into perspective.
Remind me of this when I start getting crazy again, will you? Thanks.